What Not to Wear

What Not to Wear

Love green? Own it.

You give a lot of advice about what to do. Do you have any advice about what not to do? (Question inspired by Dear Sugar)

How To: Receive Compliments

How To Receive Compliments

Image via

At work lately, I've noticed on more than one occasion that female coworkers struggle to accept compliments. They'll say things to diminish what they did or say "thanks, but..." and explain why they should have done better. 
I wanted to write about this, but I'm struggling a bit. I've noticed it to be gendered, but I also largely work with women, and most of the women I work with are the ones kicking ass and getting complimented. I have a knee-jerk reaction to the idea that women aren't as able as men to accept compliments, but I think it's worth thinking about. 

Dear Sugar: Tiny Revolutions

 
I recently read the most incredible book. It's called Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on love and life from Dear Sugar. It was published in 2012 and contains some columns previously published in what was an anonymous advice column at the time (the author was revealed when the book was published, and the book contains newly published entries, too), but I just read it.  I'm not affiliated in any way with the author, but I want everyone I know to read this book. It matters to me so much that I'm going to start posting some of the columns from it here in the hopes that you will read-and share-them. If you're offended by swear words and graphic language, be aware that she uses some. If you'd rather only read my posts about personal style, come back soon. Today, I'm going to underline the parts that stand out to me. Please feel free to comment if you are so moved.

Body Inspiration

Body Inspiration

Have you all seen this incredible compilation? I love it.  Like this

And this

And this

And proud to say that my business would NOT be one of them!

Happy New Year to all of us-and the bodies that we inhabit this time around.

Why do we wear clothes we don’t love?

I was very honored to be asked over to Love Always Hannah today to talk about what motivates me to work with women to help us step into our power. Hannah is an inspiration, and I consider her blog to be a ministry for the woman's soul. Here's a preview, read the rest here.

Why do we wear clothes we don’t love?

Via

We hold on to clothes that we don’t love the way we feel in because we’re afraid that we’re the problem-not the clothes.  We’re afraid that there isn’t a better option-that we won’t feel beautiful in anything. So instead of getting rid of things that don’t fit, don’t flatter, and don’t inspire, we hold on to them. What if we can’t find anything better, we think, and we don’t have anything? What if we are just left with what we perceive as the reality-that we are the problem, not our clothes. We think of it as our bodies not being the right shape or size instead of the clothes not being the right shape or size for our bodies...Read more.

Would You Wear Faux Leather?

Would You Wear Faux Leather?

I'm funny about certain things. Like faux leather. I have some pants that are mostly coated jeans but have a faux leather look to them, and I must have liked how they looked in the store, but until two weekends ago, I hadn't worn them outside the house. Wait, let me clarify that: this time around I hadn't worn them outside of the house. Last time that faux leather was in style a few years ago, I wore them a lot (think "liquid leggings"), which is probably why I was feeling like I was too old to wear them this time. Well, I bit the bullet! I put them on with a cozy, longish sweater on top and headed to the mall in the middle of a torrential downpour.

A funny thing happened-I meant to change out of my rain boots after bringing the dogs out and before getting in my car, but I arrived at the mall with the boots still on. Then I realized: they're just PANTS! Like any other pants! Somehow the strange pairing with my boots made me feel more comfortable about them. Here is me realizing that they're OK!

And, since they're just pants, like any others, I could do things that I do with pants, like roll them up at the ankle, pair them with cozy fisherman sweaters, and take gratuitous selfies in the Gap changing room!

My thought is this: maybe wear something this week that kind of scares you or has you feeling like you're not as _______ as you were before/would like to be/could be. Chances are, you're gonna love it.

And, of course, I'd love to see what comes out of this experiment!

Three Pounds Less

via

I love this so much. I've recently had a lot of conversations about this line of thinking. I'm not sure if it's this age (turning 31 next month!) or if others are feeling it, but it feels to me that there's a cultural shift happening. It feels like we're ready, at least some of us, for saying "I am right here at the moment, and I'm ok with it" in regards to many aspects of our lives.

That's what I love, actually, about personal style. It's a way of being honest about our lives as they currently are and about celebrating that. It's about donating the clothes that no longer apply to our current lives and taking stock of where-and who-we are. It's not just about size, it's about lifestyle, values, how we spend our free time, and what we want the world to know about us. I love it.

Celebrating My Clients

I've gotten to work with some incredible women lately; they're "pretty damn good." Recently, I met with Hannah to tackle the myth of not wearing white after Labor Day. She's a rising star working in a fairly conservative office who was struggling to maintain her sparkle while at work and still have the energy for fun outfits during her down time. I think she looks incredible!
 

  

Then I worked with Andrea, a runner and young professional who describes herself as a "tomboy," to update her wardrobe without spending a dime. Her closet was full of incredible vintage finds, but she just wasn't wearing them in a way that made her feel excited to get dressed in the morning. Doesn't she look amazing?

 

Before Andrea there was Erika, six feet tall, redhead, PhD, young professional-professor and award winning jam maker. We spent a few hours together highlighting her made-for-Mad-Men curves and highlighting that incredible alabaster skin. She blew me away.

I also got to spend a morning doing some personal shopping for Anna, a new grandmother who has spent many years putting others' before her. She was ready to spend some time with herself (and me!). The results were incredible. "I look like my old self!" she said at the end.

And I was even featured on StyleLove!

Here's to you, women of the greater DC area. I salute you! Right where you are...

 

Weekly Roundup

I'm constantly seeing amazing deals or fantastic items that I'd love to share with everyone I know who is that size. Well, this is it! My weekly roundup will feature those items in a variety of sizes and styles. I hope they inspire you not only to shop but to shop your closet for similar items! Then, check out some styling ideas here!

Size XL-3X. Every time I hear an ad for "back to school," I cringe. I still have first day of school nightmares, even years after stopping teaching full-time. My solution for this in-between time is to wear dresses, and I think you should, too! What better way than to celebrate the fact that it is still summer while also wearing something you can transition into the fall with tights, boots, jackets, and sweaters? I love these two from Forever21.

Size Large (only). This skirt is the perfect way to continue wearing the most comfortable piece of clothing ever (maxis) into the fall because the colors aren't too summer-y. Wear it with a t-shirt and a moto jacket, a blazer and a tank, or a sweater and boots once it gets chilly. 

Size L only, was $89.50, on sale for $49 with an extra 40% off through 8/13

Size Large Maternity (only). The color! The shape! Add a light cardigan and plan to skip tights since you'll be nice and toasty anyway!

On sale for $48.88 plus an additional 40% off

Maternity. I'm not sure of a size for this, but I think this dress would work really well for maternity since the comments say that it's fairly shapeless. Also, the little belt would look adorable worn over the top of the bump! The fall colors mean that you could wear this with a blazer or cardigan well into fall.

$59.88 Was $89.50, plus an additional 40% off

Sizes XS-L. This modal tank would hide bra straps or look adorable without a bra for those who can do that. I love the dark green for fall! This would look great tucked into the skirt above, with a blazer, or just with white or patterned shorts while it's still hot outside.

All sizes, was $34.50, now $29.00 plus an additional 40% off until 8/13

 Size Medium (only). This is a splurge even on sale, but it's also striped and cashmere, so I had to include it. I really like it with the white jeans on the CM website, but I'd also like it with a dark denim and booties for fall and some chunky, dark jewelry, maybe wood? You could also JCrew it up with a button down buttoned up to the neck underneath (and a pencil skirt!), although it would be a pity to miss having that cashmere against your skin!

XSmall or Small. This dress is available in all sizes and seems to run about a size small based on the comments, but with the thin straps, I think it's probably best for a smaller size. Flowers on black are still a strong trend and could easily transition into fall with a little jacket and tights.

Was $89.50, now $49.88 plus an additional 40% off

That was so fun! I love virtual shopping for you all!

Who you think you are, you are.

Body Party

For many, many years, I thought of my body and myself as two separate entities. Isn't that weird? I freely thought about and talked (at least to myself) about my physical body in ways that I would never have talked about "myself." My body was weak, a failure, too much of one thing and not another. I would never have described myself as weak or a failure, but this body I was living in? I threw it under the bus on a regular basis, as though the two were not the same thing. I have since come to learn that the way that I think about my body reverberates throughout my life-I can't be proud of myself without being proud of the part of my self that is my physical body. It's impossible.

Part of loving to help style other people and create a closet space that reflects who they currently want to be-and are- is a celebration of our physical bodies. Part of separating this blog from my personal Cheddar N Grits blog is wanting to create that space for us to show off our physical bodies in a way that we don't often get to. I am blessed to have friends who look incredibly different from me, and I have so much fun dressing them (in my head or in real life!).

My best friends represent the variety and beauty of the female body, but so often our shapes are not the ones that are represented in magazines and even online. There is this strange uniformity to the type of female body we celebrate as feminine and beautiful, and it's typically a skinny, but busty, taller,but not "too tall," form. Today, I'd like to move away from that shape, and I'd like to celebrate that shift here over the weeks. 

It's strange to live in a culture where famous people are assumed to want to have breast re-construction, where women continue to get breast implants, and where we freely talk about "real women" as those with an hourglass figure as though other women are...fake? So today, let's start the body party with these incredible looks for my friends with petite, perky boobs-those who don't always have to wear bras.  I salute you!

Find links here.

High-Waisted Bikinis: Would you wear one?

Fashion Challenge

Would you wear a high-waisted bikini? I used to dismiss this style as available only to very petite and/or skinny woman with flat bellies and smooth sides. But! I may be changing my mind. I have recently worn high-waisted underwear, which I also used to hate, and found them to be far more flattering than I imagined they'd be. Which got me thinking about the bikinis again-maybe more of us can wear them than we think?

I think they look best with a strapless top because the small top helps to even out the fabric on the bottom, which is limiting for those of us who like to, you know, move around. But then I saw these ideas:

I'm not sure the cups in the left photo are the best fit for her, but I like the straps in both of these pictures. The black suit could easily work for someone with a larger cup size, too, as long as it had underwire. I also like that wide band in the tribal print because one of the things that's hard about high-waisted styles is that the waistband can cut into our sides, which is just uncomfortable.

My favorite idea is a faux high wasit bikini, like these!

 

Also, it's not high-waisted at all, but in keeping with the vintage theme, this is a great suit! The less crazy popular chevron becomes, the more I like it again!

All images available here

What do you think-would you wear one? If you do, email me a picture at startclosein at gmail.com!