Resolutions 2015: What Will You Promise Yourself?

Resolutions 2015: What Will You Promise Yourself?

Last year, I made three resolutions. You can read them here! How funny since this year we did host a New Year's Day party! And how did I do with the resolutions? 

     1. Do yoga went ok. I found that I don't love yoga as much as I want to love it, and I got thrown off by back problems. 

     2. Work hard. I'm not sure why this was my resolution since I tend to really work hard, maybe too hard, but I think it was about focusing on my career. I have moved around a bit in my job since then, and I did some kickass work so I'll say success! 

     3. Say yes to possibilities. This was a real guiding star for me this year, as I said yes and yes. Sometimes I'd think should I do this? And I'd come back to "say yes to possibilities." This is my inspiration for cutting back to just one resolution this year.

I'm so curious since it seems like lots of people don't anymore, but do you make resolutions at this time of year? Are they multiple, singular, long, short? What have you found works for you? Are you changing anything up this year? I've noticed a bunch of people do a word of the year, and I like that idea. I've found what works best for me, this time of year or anytime, is a short, directive phrase. I like goals like "Play more" or "Say yes." When I'm deciding between doing something or not, I run it through my goal/resolution. 

For January 2015, I'm keeping it simple-Put Your Shoulders Down. I've noticed that I hold my breath a lot, and I think this simple thing could help me to breathe, to relax, and to keep perspective during those times when my shoulders end up up by my ears. 

I'd love to know what you're promising yourself-I find this stuff so interesting! 

If I could make a resolution for my clients, it would be Talk Sweetly To Yourself. Yup, for every single client, of all ages, shapes, sizes, and stages of life. Just that.

My November Happiness Project

My November Happiness Project

Hi guys! I'm back! And...so, um, yeah. About October...I guess I just didn't make a happiness project list. October, frankly, blew by. What did I do well during October? I traveled light. I traveled a lot, and it gave me great pride to bring only a carry on most places. As we live the life of married couple sans children right now, it's fun to play the game of how little stuff can I bring since I know all that will change when/if we are lucky enough to have a child traveling with us. I said yes, this was an extension of September, but it was about saying yes to going to things instead of going home and being cozy. This led to a busy month-and lots of fun! On flip side, I also did a good job of setting boundaries. This is something I work toward every day of my life, and in September and October I continued to build some boundaries at work that I had laid early on in the fall. I'm now reaping the rewards of those boundaries and so happy that I followed my heart! 

Joy incarnate, my dog Jaxon

Now on to November. Here are the things on my mind as this month begins:

November, and fall, always seem to me to be about endings, and this year more than most. November, then, can be the death of all things that no longer serve us. For me, this will mean:

• Removing myself from all negative sources of information-especially images. This includes unfollowing blogs, Instagram accounts, and email mailing lists that feature too many skinny women, too much focus on the material or the things that they want me to believe that I need. Gone. 

• Enjoy things that are inherently November. This includes preparation for Christmas in the form of cleaning my studio and setting it up to make gifts, bringing the dogs outside as much as possible while they enjoy the cooler weather, and starting to make and freeze secret food gifts to leave on neighbors' doors during December. Shh!

• No sugar, no grains, no alcohol. I started this in October, and my body really liked it. Except that I didn't stick with it all month, and I'd like to this month.

What about you? 

Read about my June Happiness Project, including whether or not to share this on my blog here and here, about July here and here, and August here. 

Dear Sugar: That Ecstatic Parade

Image via

 I recently read the most incredible book. It's called Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on love and life from Dear Sugar. It was published in 2012 and contains some columns previously published in what was an anonymous advice column at the time (the author was revealed when the book was published, and the book contains newly published entries, too), but I just read it over our trip to Las Vegas of all places.  I'm not affiliated in any way with the author, but I want everyone I know to read this book. It matters to me so much that I'm going to start posting some of the columns from it here in the hopes that you will read-and share-them. If you're offended by swear words and graphic language, be aware that she uses some. If you'd rather only read my posts about personal style, come back soon. Today, I'm going to share my last favorite column since September is over. As usual, I'm going to underline the parts that stand out to me. Please feel free to comment one last time if you are so moved.

Fall Foibles: My First Facial

Fall Foibles: My First Facial

Here's how I ended up in the parking lot with someone hitting their door against my car (more on that later): my husband was going out of town for work. I've always wanted a husband who would say something like "why don't you go take a bath, honey" or "you should go get yourself a pedicure. Just relax." So when mine said "I hope you do something you're really excited about," I agreed with what he hadn't said but he did in my head. I was going to get a facial! I've never had one, and a friend of mine loves them.

My dull, broken-out before picture was appropriately sad.

I knew nothing about facials, however. I imagined my skin would look better, and that was good. I figured it would be relaxing. "Hi! I'm here for an 11:30 facial," I tell the yogi at the front desk. "Rachel?" she murmurs. "Huh?"

I go into the room, and she hands me a late 90s strapless towel dress. "You can remove all of your clothing or cover yourself with this. Or with the sheet," she whispers. "Um..hm....Why would I need to be naked?" I don't say aloud. She leaves, I take my shirt off, leave my pants and socks, and get on the heated (divine) bed, under the sheet, face up. I figure she'll want to wash my neck or something.

She comes in, or at least I think so. My eyes haven''t yet adjusted to the bat cave lighting situation. Then, she proceeds to sit down at my head and put on the Turbie Twist hair towel, also from the 90s, and rub a series of liquids on my face: a sandy one, then she slowly washes my face, a slippery one, then more slow motion washing, followed by an aloe-scented goo (after sun care? I wonder and don't say) that goes on my face and arms. I am glad I'd removed my shirt. More ritualistic washing. Then, what smells and feels like a berry jam. I resist licking my lips as she whispers something about goggles. Oh! There they are-something like the ones that Kramer wore on the Seinfeld episode where he buys a tanning bed. I am blind-or are my eyes shut? I can't tell. Then, she is pulling my feet out from under the blanket. Annnnd...I still have my socks on. I hadn't anticipated feeling like a virginal teenage boy. She coos something about a foot massage. My ears perk up. More goo, this time on my feet, followed by a relaxing foot rub. Then, my feet are wrapped in plastic bags and pushed into...could they be snow boots? Space boots? No. They make a wobbling noise-rain boots?! Whatever they are, they are warm. Heavenly warm. "Did you get these on Zappos?" I don't ask.

She must be washing her hands, judging by the slashing near my head. Only then do I realize how gross it would be if she rubbed my feet with feet goo and then touched my face. Relieved by the splashing noise, I take what I realize was my first deep breath.

Then she is by my ear: "It's time for the extractions." Um, what? I nod knowingly as she cotton balls my face with something in slow motion. What follows next ias the pimple scene from Hairspray except I have the swimming goggles back on again. Then more ritualistic washing of the face. Then she whispers "You're going to feel my thumb." Thumb?! Where?! Lip balm. She must have said lip balm because that appears on my lips.

Then the sound of lotion on hands and a shoulder massage. I exhale that breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding. Then a few more rounds of face washing, and the heavenly rain boots are removed. Later, as I put my shirt back on, I spied them-heating pad booties. Genius!

And just like that, she's trying to sell me the products she used, and I know we're wrapping up. The sales part is shorter than I had worried, and I'm grateful. My skin feels loved, and my back and feet wonderful. We chat about her friend's recent lip injections (too much), and I am back out in the lobby with the yogi who still thinks my name is Rachel. 

After-seems more glowy, right? Or maybe the light is just better?

Later, I'm analyzing my face (does it look better? tighter somehow? more youthful even?) in the mirror of a dressing room at Loft, and an employee comes back asking if anyone drives the make and model of my car. I quickly dress and go outside. I've parked too close to someone, apparently, and she'd like me to move my car. I do, leaving the clothes I wasn't that excited about behind.

You see, I believe in karma, and sometimes experience what I think of as a karmic boomerang. Sometimes it's just that fast. Back at the spa, a woman had opened her car door into me, shielding it with her hand. This was my pre-facial self, and I was in a rush, not yet aware that there were such beautiful things in the world as heating pad booties. I fake smiled at this woman and checked my car but didn't ask about her hand, then rushed into the spa. Wouldn't you know it, 1.5 hours later I'd blocked someone in and gotten called out for it in front of a dressing room full of people. Car karmic boomerang. But at least my skin looked shiny!

A few days later, my skin looked a bit better than it had before. Am I over-the-moon? I am for massages, and next time I'll book one! 

Dear Sugar: The Black Arc of It

My late father-in-law dances and giggles with my mother-in-law at our wedding

I recently read the most incredible book. It's called Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on love and life from Dear Sugar. It was published in 2012 and contains some columns previously published in what was an anonymous advice column at the time (the author was revealed when the book was published, and the book contains newly published entries, too), but I just read it over our trip to Las Vegas of all places.  I'm not affiliated in any way with the author, but I want everyone I know to read this book. It matters to me so much that I'm going to start posting some of the columns from it here in the hopes that you will read-and share-them. If you're offended by swear words and graphic language, be aware that she uses some. If you'd rather only read my posts about personal style, come back soon. Today, I'm going to underline the parts that stand out to me. Please feel free to comment if you are so moved.

Dear Sugar: No is Golden

Flowers from my own wedding. I did not invite my father.

I recently read the most incredible book. It's called Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on love and life from Dear Sugar. It was published in 2012 and contains some columns previously published in what was an anonymous advice column at the time (the author was revealed when the book was published, and the book contains newly published entries, too), but I just read it over our trip to Las Vegas of all places.  I'm not affiliated in any way with the author, but I want everyone I know to read this book. It matters to me so much that I'm going to start posting some of the columns from it here in the hopes that you will read-and share-them. If you're offended by swear words and graphic language, be aware that she uses some. If you'd rather only read my posts about personal style, come back soon. Today, I'm going to underline the parts that stand out to me. Please feel free to comment if you are so moved.

Dear Sugar: Tiny Revolutions

 
I recently read the most incredible book. It's called Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on love and life from Dear Sugar. It was published in 2012 and contains some columns previously published in what was an anonymous advice column at the time (the author was revealed when the book was published, and the book contains newly published entries, too), but I just read it.  I'm not affiliated in any way with the author, but I want everyone I know to read this book. It matters to me so much that I'm going to start posting some of the columns from it here in the hopes that you will read-and share-them. If you're offended by swear words and graphic language, be aware that she uses some. If you'd rather only read my posts about personal style, come back soon. Today, I'm going to underline the parts that stand out to me. Please feel free to comment if you are so moved.

Are You Out for Blood?

Are You Out for Blood?

 

We all do it. We have a switch that flips in our brains. One minute, I'm sitting peacefully at a conference table, listening and contributing to the meeting around me. The next, I'm out for blood. It may be something I heard someone say (regardless of what they intended to say or actually did say) or a reaction to body language or just the last thing to get on my nerves today. Either way, I can feel my heart racing, and I'm ready to pounce. It's an awful feeling.

Have you been there?

Here's the thing, though, are you treating yourself that way? Are you looking at yourself in the mirror or in pictures and taking aim directly at your own heart?

I hear it all the time, and I'm also sometimes guilty of the same thing. Ready, aim, fire. As hurtful as this kind of approach to other people can be, it's even worse when we turn it inside.

I have so many clients who talk to themselves and about themselves in this way, as though they're at war. I'm so fat. Well, you know how my stomach jiggles when I walk? I'm too old to care about how I look. I could never pull that off. Nobody cares what I look like. With my butt? No way! If I were skinnier...If I were younger...If I were in better shape. We've all done it.

And I'm here, raising my voice, joining the chorus of women who have risen up to say that's enough. Let's stop treating ourselves like our own worst enemies. Let's be gentle with ourselves, 'k?

Byron Katie says to start with yourself: you say you are against violence and war in the world, but what about war within? Would we ever talk about a friend's body, shape, weight, or age like we talk about our own?

Let's start today, let's start right now, let's take the first step, close in. Let's talk to ourselves and about ourselves like we would about a dear friend, about the person we love most in the world. Can we make a pact? Can we pinky promise? I'm holding my pinky out to each of you.

Best,
Ella

Photography : Lauren Modny Photography

Personal Styling : Start Close In
Creative Concept & Direction : Piccadilly
Location : Reston, Virginia

Dear Sugar: How You Get Unstuck

I recently read the most incredible book. It's called Tiny Beautiful Things: Advice on love and life from Dear Sugar. It was published in 2012 and contains some columns previously published in what was an anonymous advice column at the time (the author was revealed when the book was published, and the book contains newly published entries, too), but I just read it over our trip to Las Vegas of all places.  I'm not affiliated in any way with the author, but I want everyone I know to read this book. It matters to me so much that I'm going to start posting some of the columns from it here in the hopes that you will read-and share-them. If you're offended by swear words and graphic language, be aware that she uses some. If you'd rather only read my posts about personal style, come back soon. Today, I'm going to underline the parts that stand out to me. Please feel free to comment if you are so moved.

My Happiness Project: September

My Happiness Project: September

Photography : Lauren Modny Photography
Creative Concept & Direction : Piccadilly

So! It's September. The school buses are running, the leaves are even turning a bit here and there...how the heck did THAT happen?! I certainly did not get the memo, as no kids say anymore anywhere. I wrote the date as 6/31/14 on August 31. That's right, June. Now that I'm on the same calendar page as everyone else, let's look back at August and ahead to September, shall we?

Here were my August Happiness Project goals:

• Practice SOS. While reading parenting books somewhere in the last couple of years, I came across the idea of Step Back, Observe, and Speak on one of them. I think in my current job environment this could really serve me well instead of my usual Speak, Speak, Speak! And I'm sure my husband would think so, too. Update: I liked having this mantra in mind all month. I found myself making fewer, more useful comments at home and at work.
• Nurture Friendships. My post this week about just hanging out has got me thinking a lot about the type of friend I am. I tend to have a few very close friends, and I love that about my life. This month I'd like to make time for my friends-old, close, new, and possible. I need to think about exactly how, but I think it involves saying "Yes" to more unstructured time as well as to making time for my casual friendships like those with neighbors. I did ok with this-I had some special time with friends, but I think this is an ongoing project for me-figuring out how to have adult friends in a way that feels easy and less structured. I did plan some upcoming visits to best friends far away!
• Enjoy the things about summer that I love. All winter long, I dream about summer food and fun, and I want to be sure to enjoy it while it's here. For me, this includes walks in nature, time in the sun, eating in-season produce, gardening, watching outdoor movies, and going to county fairs. I'm excited already! This was a big part of August for me. I traveled, went to our local pool, was outside a lot, and generally focused on celebrating summer! My husband and I give each other "assignments" every week for the past month or two, and his assignment this week is to remind me of ways to savor the last bits of summer. His suggestions so far have been adorable!

Now for September!

• Spread the Love: I am going to share some of the things I've learned over the years beyond just the personal styling realm. Stay tuned for more details!
• Cook 5 Nights a Week: I've been very inspired by Dinner a Love Story's new book and her challenge to cook 5 nights a week. I love to cook, and my body does much better on homecooked food. I'm using this as a reason to sit down with friends and family more, too.
• Heal my Back: I'm setting this as a lofty goal, and I mean to achieve it! I'm putting aside the time and money needed for chiropractic, PT, supportive shoes, inserts, and everything else that my back needs. It must be a priority.

Read about my June Happiness Project, including whether or not to share this on my blog here and here, about July here and here, and August here.

My Happiness Project: Closing July and Moving to August

My Happiness Project: Closing July and Moving to August

Ok, wow! So somehow it's August this week. How did that happen? If I'm not paying attention, I am still writing June as the month we're in. I've got to get with the program before my favorite season of the year is over!

Here were my happiness projects for July along with an update for those of you who are following along!

• purge stuff: this went really well! I lost track of how many bags of stuff we donated-to friends and to local spots. It was a lot! We even got bookshelves and a daybed out of our home and into the homes of our friends who wanted them! And it's continued beyond the concentrated effort early in the month; as we find things that bug us or that we don't love (socks, plastic tupperware, etc.), we're getting them out of the house. I love the feeling of getting RID of things we don't want.
• create beauty: this went well and is continuing. I tackled a huge project in re-painting our first floor, very dark blue powder room. I had it painted when we first moved in during that phase that everyone was painting their walls black. I loved the creepy Victorian feeling of it for awhile, and then it just felt out of place. It's almost done now! I can't wait to show it off. Also, I removed all of the artwork from our walls and need to re-distribute it in new places where it feels like it belongs.
• use what we have: this has been a great mantra for me. When I get excited about house projects, I can really be caught up in the urge to bring more things into my house. Instead, this month I thought to myself, "Use what you have!" I literally turned around halfway to Home Depot one night after reminding myself that I already had plenty of projects and the materials to do them before adding yet another. This led to my powder room project! It was also the impetus behind re-hanging the art we have before launching into a big framing project for new art.
• do one of my husband's projects with him: this ended up working out very differently than I imagined! I imagined doing a physical project with him, but instead the two projects we did ended up being slightly different. One is health-related and has me feeling very supportive of him in a beautiful way, and the other was his idea! We've been sharing mini weekly assignments with each other-ways to keep each other accountable and also very loved. For example, I asked him to say the words "How can I help?" anytime he sensed that I was stressed during the first week. It's been a lot of fun hearing what each one would like the other to do!

I love the Happiness Project model because it really feels like each thing adds up to significant shifts in thinking and feeling!

For August, I'm going to move my focus away a bit from physical projects and focus on the emotional side more. Here are my items:

• Practice SOS. While reading parenting books somewhere in the last couple of years, I came across the idea of Step Back, Observe, and Speak on one of them. I think in my current job environment this could really serve me well instead of my usual Speak, Speak, Speak! And I'm sure my husband would think so, too.
• Nurture Friendships. My post this week about just hanging out has got me thinking a lot about the type of friend I am. I tend to have a few very close friends, and I love that about my life. This month I'd like to make time for my friends-old, close, new, and possible. I need to think about exactly how, but I think it involves saying "Yes" to more unstructured time as well as to making time for my casual friendships like those with neighbors.
• Enjoy the things about summer that I love. All winter long, I dream about summer food and fun, and I want to be sure to enjoy it while it's here. For me, this includes walks in nature, time in the sun, eating in-season produce, gardening, watching outdoor movies, and going to county fairs. I'm excited already! 

What about you? I know from Instagram and email that some of you are doing your own Happiness Projects. Keep up the good work!

This week's mani-pedi in neon colors was all about living summer to its fullest!!

Anxiety and Getting Dressed

Anxiety and Getting Dressed

Photo via Love Always Hannah

Last week, I had two occasions that left me feeling like a fraud. I was just trying to get dressed, and I freaked out. This used to happen to me a lot, and it happens sometimes still when I'm going somewhere I'm nervous about. If I don't know a lot about where I'm going or who else will be there, I get extremely anxious about what to wear. It sounds silly, but I know you'll understand.

As a kid, there were so many times that I felt ashamed of the clothing that I had-or didn't have. I recognized the social ease that clothing provided to my wealthier classmates, and I guess that same shame still haunts me in some ways.

Now, as a personal stylist, I can't help but laughing at myself as I struggle, trying on outfit after outfit, becoming more and more anxious. But what I've remembered is that this is one of the reasons that I started StartCloseIn. I know that there are other women like me out there who physically panic when we're trying to dress ourselves. Usually, I have outfits lined up and picked out for the week, but where I still struggle is with the casual stuff. One night last week we were headed to dinner with friends we met years ago and hadn't seen since. It felt like I wanted to wear just the right thing, but I couldn't figure out what that was. Really, I was feeling emotional about other things in my life, and I probably would have been kinder to myself to reschedule that night's dinner and curl up with a book instead.

Then, last weekend, I panicked while choosing what to wear to a town function when the dress I had in mind ended up being too revealing only a few minutes before we had to leave. What makes matters worse is that I feel like I shouldn't be so concerned about it. Phrases like "they're just clothes" come to mind.

I'm writing about this because I have a new idea to help myself overcome this, and I think it might help you, too. Here's what I'm planning to do in keeping with July's plan to purge.

I'm going to take a realistic look at my closet. Yes, it's been pared down, but I still have things in there that I don't wear-or that I wear but I don't want to wear. I used to think that having more choices was better than fewer, but I'm coming to see that I get easily overwhelmed. Instead, my plan is to take everything out of my closet and only put it back in if the answer to each one of these questions is YES.

1. Does this fit and flatter my current body?
2. Do I have somewhere to wear this in the next month? and
3. Do I want to wear this? Is it my style?

Anything that doesn't get a YES from all three will be donated, given away, or stored. I'd like to re-visit the stored items frequently (at the beginning of each season?) to re-evaluate them. I think this will solve the problems of having things taking up valuable visible space that don't fit or don't flatter me currently ("that looks good when my X is more/less Y"), that I might someday wear but never really wear, (flapper costume, club wear) or that are not the style I want to be portraying (sad t-shirts with holes, styles that look great on other people but aren't really me).

What I've realized is that I'd rather have 10 things in my closet that I love and want to wear on my actual body to actual functions than 100 things that are perfect for someone else.  What I also realized was that I went through this exact process with one of my closest friends, Hannah, back in the spring! And I thought, I really thought, that I had my own closet pared down, but it's just time for another, more brutal look at the clothes that I'm letting occupy my closet.

Even if that means that I end up with mostly black and the rest stripes, that's ok. I often pressure myself to wear color because it's summer and I should.  But you know what? Stripes and black and white and gray? That's me, and I'm ready to embrace it. So here's what I want you to know: we all have anxiety around clothing and our bodies, and I'm right there with you. Also? I'd love to hear if you decide to purge in your closet, even if the clothes just move to a box under the bed. I know I'm not ready to throw away everything, either!

And, if you're in the DC area, we should have a clothing swap at my house soon. Are you game?

My Happiness Project: July

My Happiness Project: July

Via my home inspiration Pinterest board

This month was one of those where I felt reminded, again, that I am not the Doer. So often the plan that I have in my heart and in my head is not the one that the Universe has for me. Isn't it humbling to submit to that knowledge? I picture it like a huge pool of water spread out before me, and all I must do, all I can do in fact, is dive in.

I am excited, actually, to purge this month. Some of what I had in mind for July (underreact in the moment, mediate, etc.) feels difficult, if not impossible, without doing what I want to do in July instead: create a calm, centered physical home space. I find myself feeling overwhelmed by the amount of physical stuff that I have around me at home, and I'm ready to PURGE!

To that end, I'm going to slide my August project into July, which means July's activities are:

• purge stuff, 
• create beauty,
• use what we have, and 
• do one of my husband's projects with him.

Purge Stuff

Happier at Home got me really excited to purge stuff because its author used a few questions to do the same in her home. Paraphrasing here, she asked herself a series of questions that really stuck with me:

Do we need this thing? Do we love this thing? Do we use this thing? Would I pay to replace this if it broke?

Well, huhn! That puts a fine point on it, doesn't it?

Other questions I'd like to ask myself as I go from room to room evaluating what can stay and what needs to find a new home outside of our home are: would I pay to frame this emotional thing? Would I like to look at a picture of this memory instead? And, for functional objects, is there a more efficient/smaller/more beautiful version of this that I could use instead?  For example, we recently purchased a new kitchen colander because we both hated (and can't it really rise to that level?) the plastic one we had. And I bought only the largest, most useful metal size instead of the pack of 4 varying sizes the store wanted me to buy. If I had a hook to put it on, this would be the perfect example.

I also love her 10 Tips to Beat Clutter, Why I've Grown Weary of Accepting Anything That's Free, 

Create Beauty

When we first moved into our home, we spent a lot of time making it feel like we wanted it to. Lately, I've focused more on other things (fertility, job, this business, etc), and the time for turning back to the house feels right. I have plans for our garden, hanging artwork in gallery walls, and for creating what Happier at Home refers to as "altars" as in an altar to family game night or to holidays.

Use What We Have

In creating beauty within and outside of our home, I'll use what we already have as far as materials, supplies, and tools before going out to purchase more things (see "stuff" above, right?). I have the things to sew and make many, many beautiful projects, and this month will be about setting aside the time to consider what to keep of those materials and then to actually use them to "create beauty."

Do One of My Husband's Projects with Him

One key thing from the Happiness Project books is to avoid creating work for other people. While my husband will benefit from my project because I'll be happier, the intent is not to make him go along with it. This activity, then, isn't about telling him he needs to do a project but rather to observe what he's working on (or wants to work on if he had help) and volunteer to be his assistant in it. I'm excited to see what I get to help with! Usually on what we call "project days" he does his stuff, and I do mine. This will be something we do together.

What about you ladies playing along at home? What will July bring to your life?

My June Happiness Project Update

My June Happiness Project Update

In late May, I laid out my plan for June, and since we're midway through I thought I'd give you all and update. I know you've been waiting on the edge of your seat! Here are my goals and a quick update on each:

• The word of the month is HEALTHY: initially, I wasn't sure about having a word of the month. I didn't have one the first time I did a Happiness Project year, and I thought it might ground me. So far, it's not adding much for me. Honestly, I forgot my word. I think I'll write it on a post it and put it on my work computer screen to remind myself of what the main goal is this month: healthy.

• No sugar: Gretchen Rubin talks about two types of people: those who are moderators and those who abstain. I think she uses a more graceful second word, but you get the idea. I tend to be an abstainer because once I give myself permission to have "a little" of something (like sugar), I can go hog-wild and next thing I know I'm having it every day. I do much better with saying NONE and holding myself to that. In this case, true to form, I've been bending the rules. I started off with nothing, not honey, nothing sweet. Then I found that I'd stopped drinking liquids. Now I'm allowing myself honey and coconut sugar. Also? I made the most delicious cake (gluten free! dairy free! you'd never know it!) ever and ate it for breakfast. I subbed coconut sugar for the sugar and ground it up in place of the powdered sugar, too. I think I could do better, but overall I'm eating less sugar so I call this a work in progress.

My Happiness Project: June

My Happiness Project: June

I debated about whether to write about this here or not, but I've decided to put it out there. Have you ever read The Happiness Project:Or, Why I Spent a Year Trying to Sing in the Morning, Clean My Closets, Fight Right, Read Aristotle, and Generally Have More Fun? My husband read it on a vacation shortly after it first came out, and he handed it to me immediately. We loved it. Last week, in the Outer Banks, I picked up her second book on the topic, Happier at Home: Kiss More, Jump More, Abandon Self Control and My Other Experiments in Everyday Life. Both are a fast read, but the second reminded me of how much I liked the first book-and, more so, how much I liked the small changes I made to my life after reading it!

So, I'm doing another happiness project! From now until December, I'll be focusing on a different topic each month, and I'd like to invite you to do the same. You could get a primer in the concept on her website if you don't have time to read the entire book. I'd love to hear what your project includes if you decide to play along with me!

Strawberry Lime Cucumber Mint Water via

Here's my plan: